I hate to sound like some old man who doesn't understand today's generation, but I just have to ask one questions. "When did it become a sign of social status to continually use profanity in regular conversation?" Now, some of you are going to say, "Jim, you were a Marine, right?" And you'd be right. I mastered the ability to use profane language in all grammatical variations; nouns, verbs (transitive or intransitive), adjectives, and adverbs; it's a skill that all marines need to master before they can graduate boot camp...but I digress.
Now, I make this observational question because I took my daughters to a local park today and Gabbie came over to me and said, "I can't have fun because those kids are swearing." Now, I was busy taking pictures of the girls (yes, my girls you perverts) and wasn't really paying attention to the other kids. So, when Gabbie brought it to my attention, I started listening. Holy sh...cow! The potty mouths on those kids. Of course, I should be happy that my daughter was offended enough by the kids language to bring it to my attention. This segues to a great story about Gabbie (When she was about 3 - Sonja's age - we were driving to Wally-World and she threw out an F-inheimer. Annette and I, after the shock wore off, yelled a bit and she cried; of course, we knew she probably heard it from one of us, so we explained how it was a bad word and shouldn't be used. As we're walking into Wally-World Gabbie says to me, "Daddy?" I said, "Yes, honey." She responded with, "Shits a bad word, too." Ugh).
Well, back to my point at hand. I question when it become socially acceptable in public to use profanity. When did kids lose the concept of common decency. Maybe I've just become more sensitive to it now that I have children. I don't know. I just know that, even in situations that I was with my friends in high school, that we didn't say "f this" and "f that" when talking - at least I don't remember it. I know that as a kid (teenager) the words were in my vocabulary. Let me share another funny story - though, not as funny as my daughter's transgression earlier documented.
My sister, Shari and her husband, Dan had to live in a apartment above a home/styling salon in our hometown, while they were building their current home. During this time, we were in possession of a gas grill they had but couldn't use at their temporary location. One night my mom and I were grilling burgers (I think), and I was flipping the burgers. The grill was hot and burned me. I pulled back and yelled, "Yow...that fuckin' hurt!" Now, I knew right away that the word that came out of my mouth was not going to go over well. I would have liked to have used an "Uff da", but I didn't. Well, my mom's look sent shivers through my spine. You would have thought I had just cursed the Virgin Mary herself. I think I quickly said "frickin," but it was way too late. No "frickin" or "Fubar" was going to stop the ringing in Audrey's ears. I think her ears actually started to bleed.
Obviously, it was a different time and a different place, and I could have a lapse in memory when telling you that my friends and I didn't use profanity much...we were drinking...OMG, did I actually just say that!?! I hope I didn't just out anyone who's parents thought they were perfect Angels in high school.
Okay, fast forward to today. I listened to a girls use the "f-inheimer" like it was an article (a ,an, and the) and another kid calling a girl a "bitch." I remember calling my sister a bitch once and spent a half-hour in a room by myself contemplating the stupidity I had just displayed in front of family and friends...I deserved it. These kids didn't have any quorums using profanity. Now, I didn't say anything. A Facebook friend said I should have said something for my daughters' sake. She was probably right. I didn't due my personal decision that it's "none of my business." Of course, fore my daughters' sake, perhaps it is my business.
It's understandable that the world has changed. Television, movies, and the internet have made all types of images, language, and concepts available. I wouldn't ask that we restrict this information. However, I know there was a regulator, something within me, that made me govern what came out of my mouth in situations. That restriction seems to be missing - at least in what I observed. I only hope that as my daughters grow older, that that filter continues to work, the one that seemed to work so well for me.
Well said!
ReplyDelete